About Me

A tongue in cheek look at what it takes to be a good wife, in the kitchen and elsewhere, from a diehard liberal feminist. Recipes to fill your belly, tips to make your day easier and advice on how to save money and stay organized.

I grew up an only child near the St. Louis area.  I was raised Catholic; wanted to be a nun.  Then I went off to college and took some Women's Studies courses and became an atheist, liberal, feminist.  I think my mom wore out her rosary those first few years.

I moved to central Illinois to finish college and I met The Good Husband.  We moved in together after six months of dating (I was hussying it up) and got engaged a year later.  We were engaged for two and a half years while we finished college and got a career established.  We had a small traditional wedding in May 2006 and are still going strong four shambling along seven years later.

Adjusting to married life wasn't all that hard after the few years of living in sin.  After I got over the feeling of "OMG, someone is touching my fucking stuff all the damn time", I was able to find ways to make our life easier by developing schedules and routines. 

I wasn't always an organized person and in my wild, wild days of youth, the last thing I wanted to do was clean. In the beginning, while we were both still full time students, it was hard to find a way to clean the house and cook dinner while adjusting to shift work and school.  I struggled against the traditional wifely roles. I was a feminist, damn it, and why was I spending all my time cooking and cleaning? I learned to embrace my domestic side while still holding on to my feminist ideals. I had the option to stay in the kitchen and I was using it.

I also had never cooked anything a day in my life. My mother only cooked for me less than a handful of times and I had gotten food positioning all but once. The first Christmas TGH and I were dating, his grandma gave me The Better Homes and Gardens Cookbook and told me to use it if I was going to live with TGH. So I read it cover to cover and slowly started to play around in the kitchen. I watched The Food Network for a solid year before I felt comfortable enough to try new things. Still the first dinner I ever made TGH was a disaster and he only choked it down so I wouldn't cry.  I still remember every failed dish I have made.

I think you can see the progression from the first few dishes I blogged about to something such as The Farmer's Market Salad. The Good Wife of 2002 would never have touched that before. But I am still learning and expanding and trying to develop a strong palate and confidence in the kitchen. But I am proof that a girl that didn't know how to boil water can make some decent food that doesn't come from a can or box.

In October 2008, TGH learned he was getting laid off.  Two days later we learned I was pregnant.  All while we were having our first house built.  Luckily TGH was only unemployed for six months and we were able to move and welcome The Good Baby into the world with good health insurance.  

Moving into The Good Home was a blessing. Everyone had their own space. I was able to have a dedicated office, since I work from home, and my kitchen was fucking huge. I still don't have it organized the way I want but it is coming along. I had a self interest to keep it clean and tidy and to have food on the table every night. We are going to stay here for 30 years, so we have a reason to care for our little piece of the Earth.

Entering into the world of Mommyhood has been a huge adjustment and I have had some struggles. I have had let go of my desire to have every.fucking.single.thing.perfect.all.the.damn.time. I have had to learn that some days the kitchen won't get swept and the clothes won't get put away and we will have cereal for dinner. I am slowly becoming okay with that. But I enjoy The Good Baby more than anything on this Earth, even on the days where it seems like she was taking more than I had to give. I wouldn't trade her for anything. Not even a year of an anal retentive cleaning service.

ETA: Three short years and two weeks after the arrival of TGD, I was beyond thrilled to welcome The Good Son into the world. I am honored and humbled that I get to raise a strong feminist boy to help change the world alongside my daughter. I'm still struggling to juggle it all - work, home, mommy-ness, wifedom - and not go insane and most days I feel like I have my shit together b.c the kids are fed and alive. Oh, and the house is a hot mess.

I hope that gives you a good picture of who The Good Wife is and the areas of my life the blog will focus on.